October 24, 2011
Our son was born March 12th, 2009. He's a little over two and a half years old. Now, I am the wussiest wuss to ever wuss up the joint, so take everything I'm about to say with a grain of salt – but choosing to become a parent is the hardest thing I have ever done. By far. Everything else pales in comparison.
My feelings on this matter are complex. I made a graph. You know, for the children.
That one percent makes all the difference.
It's difficult to explain children to people who don't yet have children, because becoming a parent is an intensely personal experience. Every child is different. Every parent is different. Every culture has their own way of doing things. The experience is fundamentally different for every new parent in the world, yet children are the one universally shared thing that binds our giant collective chain letter of human beings together, regardless of nationality and language. How do you explain the unexplainable?
Well, having children changes you. Jonathan Coulton likens it to becoming a vampire.
I was having a conversation with a friend who had recently become a parent, and she reminded me of something I had forgotten about since my daughter was born. She was describing this what-have-I-done feeling – I just got everything perfect in my life, and then I went and messed it all up by having a baby. I don’t feel that way anymore, but the thought certainly crossed my mind a few times at the beginning. Eventually you just fall in love and forget about everything else, but it’s not a very comfortable transition. I compare the process to becoming a vampire, your old self dies in a sad and painful way, but then you come out the other side with immortality, super strength and a taste for human blood. At least that’s how it was for me. At any rate, it’s complicated.
Maybe tongue in cheek, but not that far from the truth, honestly. Your children, they ruin everything in the nicest way.
Before Henry was born, I remembered Scott Hanselman writing this odd blurb about being a parent:
You think you love you wife when you marry her. Then you have a baby and you realize you'd throw your
wife yourself under a bus to save your baby. You can't love something more.
Nuts to that, I thought. Hanselman's crazy. Well, obviously he doesn't love his wife as much as I love mine. Sniff. Babies, whatever, sure, they're super cute on calendars, just like puppies and kittens. Then I had a baby. And by God, he was right. I wouldn't just throw myself under a bus for my baby, I'd happily throw my wife under that bus too – without the slightest hesitation. What the hell just happened to me?
As an adult, you may think you've roughly mapped the continent of love and relationships. You've loved your parents, a few of your friends, eventually a significant other. You have some tentative cartography to work with from your explorations. You form ideas about what love is, its borders and boundaries. Then you have a child, look up to the sky, and suddenly understand that those bright dots in the sky are whole other galaxies.
You can't possibly know the enormity of the feelings you will have for your children. It is absolutely fucking terrifying.
When I am holding Henry and I tickle him, I can feel him laughing all the way to his toes. And I realize, my God, I had forgotten, I had completely forgotten how unbelievably, inexplicably wonderful it is that any of us exist at all. Here I am with this tiny, warm body so close to me, breathing so fast he can barely catch up, sharing his newfound joy of simply being alive with me. The sublime joy of this moment, and all the other milestones – the first smile, the first laugh, the first "dada" or "mama", the first kiss, the first time you hold hands. The highs are so incredibly high that you'll get vertigo and wonder if you can ever reach that feeling again. But you peak ever higher and higher, with dizzying regularity. Being a new parent is both terrifying and exhilarating, a constant rollercoaster of extreme highs and lows.
It's also a history lesson. The first four years of your life. Do you remember them? What's your earliest memory? It is fascinating watching your child claw their way up the developmental ladder from baby to toddler to child. All this stuff we take for granted, but your baby will painstakingly work their way through trial and error: eating, moving, walking, talking. Arms and legs, how the hell do they work? Turns out, we human beings are kind of amazing animals. There's no better way to understand just how amazing humans are than the front row seat a child gives you to observe it all unfold from scratch each and every day, from literal square zero. Children give the first four years of your life back to you.
I wasn't sure how to explain meeting new people to Henry, so I decided to just tell him we've met a new "friend" every time. Now, understand that this is not at all the way I view the world. I'm extremely wary of strangers, and of new people in general with their agendas and biases and opinions. I've been burned too many times. But Henry is open to every person he meets by default. Each new person is worth greeting, worth meeting as a new experience, as a fellow human being. Henry taught me, without even trying to, that I've been doing it all wrong. I realized that I'm afraid of other people, and it's only my own fear preventing me from opening up, even a little, to new people that I meet. I really should view every new person I meet as a potential friend. I'm not quite there yet; it's still a work in progress. But with Henry's help, I think I can. I had absolutely no idea my child would end up teaching me as much as I'm teaching him.
Having a child is a lot like running a marathon. An incredible challenge, but a worthwhile and transformative experience. It leaves you feeling like you truly accomplished something for all that effort. After all, you've created something kind of amazing: a person.
Bob: It gets a whole lot more complicated when you have kids.
Charlotte: It's scary.
Bob: The most terrifying day of your life is the day the first one is born.
Charlotte: Nobody ever tells you that.
Bob: Your life, as you know it... is gone. Never to return. But they learn how to walk, and they learn how to talk, and you want to be with them. And they turn out to be the most delightful people you will ever meet in your life.
It's scary and it's wonderful in equal measure. So why not have another baby? Or so we thought.
Turns out, we're having two babies. Both are girls, due in mid-February 2012.
I've been told several times that you should never be crazy enough to let the children outnumber you. I hope to ultimately win the War of the Lady Babies, but when it comes to children, I think all anyone can ever realistically hope for is a peaceful surrender.
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Posted by Jeff Atwood
Twins: twice the joy... twice the trouble :D
Jeff, Congrats. We had a 3 yo boy when my wife gave birth to twin girls. Now 5 and 2 (x2). Sounds like similar dynamics. All I can say is hold on! You have taught me so much on the dev front, let me know if I can help out on the baby front... not that I have all the answers.
My 3rd son was just born last week... but really, I'm not stressed or worried at this point. Having a 3rd kid is sort of like climbing out of a swimming pool (still wearing all your clothes), and somebody then points a water gun at you. You just laugh.
My favorite quote about parenthood, though, was something like this:
Q: Does being a parent change your life?
A: Change? CHANGE? It f#**#?& destroys your existing life, then swaps it out for a completely new one. A good one, but completely new. :-)
> Write while you can. By february this blog will be dead. :-)
That's the best comment ever. So true.
Ha! Congrats Jeff! Twins!!!
Thanks for sharing. It's been fun watching your business and personal life unfold.
(father of two)
Congratulations! I have seven; the two youngest are 13 now. I really miss their younger years. Enjoy them fiercely while you can.
Oh boy do I remember that ultrasound picture! My first kid ended up being twins! XD Good luck and congratulations! :)
Congratulations, Jeff! Enjoy the twins!
Awesome. We had twins a couple weeks before you had your singlet. There are some great 'support groups' in the bay area. :) MPPOM is cool. My wife really enjoys it, and the people in it: http://www.mppom.org/. They have expectant parents meetings too. Let me know if you ever want to chat about it or ask questions of a fellow geek and parent of multiples.
Congratulations. I am a father of 3 adorable girls, two of which are also twins, same as you. I am totally belong to that 51% of group of people, enjoying the parenthood at the moment. It's an once in a life thing that you will miss a hell out of it once it's passed.
Hope you will enjoy that moments too.
Congrats Jeff! Good luck with the twins!
Wow. You pretty much hit the nail right on the head. I have a little boy myself who will be 3 in December. I had just turned 17 when he was born, and it was the most amazing/horrifying/beautiful/confusing thing anyone can experience. All the luck to you with your twin girls(I'd of Falcon Punched my way out of that situation awhile ago).
Congrats! Good luck on building your horde.
Congratulations and I couldn't agree more.
I could try to congratulate you, but I wouldn't do as awesome a job as Richard M Stallman:
It doesn't take special talents to reproduce--even plants can do it. On the other hand, contributing to a program like Emacs takes real skill. That is really something to be proud of. It helps more people, too.
BTW, I'm being sarcastic, I use VIM (try the veal).
In all seriousness, congratulations, and I look forward to the creation of two new twitter accounts!
Congratulations on the twins... and good luck.
My wife and I had twins 10 months ago. You are in for a wild ride. Those first 5 months were as brutal a time as I have ever had in my life. But nowadays, those two little girls are literally the best part of my day. I never thought I'd get there.
If you want a glimpse into life with twin newborns you can go to my blog:
Scroll back to the beginning of the year for a full view.
Again... good luck!
Beautiful piece Jeff, I really enjoy your blog. And congrats on the twins! It's amazing how parenthood can be the hardest and easiest thing to do all at one time.
Found my way here via a tweet from @aycangulez. Thanks for a brilliant post. I'm a dad of two girls (7 and 5) and a boy (2). There were some ugly times early on as I mourned the loss of my carefree, kid-free lifestyle; and being a parent is incredibly hard work. But I wouldn't trade it for anything. I just spend a weekend with just my son, as my wife was out of town with the girls, and it was the best. Kids really do focus your life in a way that is unlike anything else.
As the kids get older, remember to take individual time with each of them on a regular basis. With all that humanity swimming around in your house, it means the world to a kid to get unfiltered one-on-one time with mom or dad, just going out for breakfast or to a movie or to kick the ball around in the part.
And I too was laughing hysterically at @StacyConaway's list. I have a steadily-lengthening list of "things I never thought I'd hear myself say", such as "Stop hitting your sister with the fish!"
haha, amazing, gratulations! :)
reminds me of my friends sister, she had two boys and desperately wanted a girl. So she get twin boys.. their home is never silent :)
I have two boys, the hardest thing I ever done, but nothing really compares to it. Only bad thing is that the time fly.. so enjoy it!
The thing with kids, you say "I know everthing there is to know about kids" .. and then BAAAM .. "I don't know a sh!t about kids"
At any rate, thank you for always being so open, geeky AND human, thats why we always keep coming back here.
Congratulations on the twins and thanks for the post I enjoyed it very much.
Well said... and congrats.
Congrats! Hope you too find that having kids isn't quite as bad as O(n!). Gives new meaning to the term "expansion by minors" :-)
Congratulations. Guess someone didn't remember to make their wives eggs properly thread safe before using them in a, uh, 'production environment' :p
Long time listener, first time caller...
Just wanted to say, "Congratulations." You're going to be a busy family. Enjoy.
My friend just had twins. The trick is getting them synchronized :)
Wow, congratulations, the best of all to your family and the new members of, too.
My wife and I had our first child with fertility help. When he was 2, we had twin boys also with help.
My friend, clearly you understand what it takes to be a father. You have managed to express it here with astonishing clarity.
I want you to know that when your twins show up, they will be adorable and they will immediately push you far beyond the bounds of your own sanity. When that day comes, I want you to email me and I will do what I can to help and give you some tips I learned from raising my own twins (they are 5 now).
Congratulations to you and welcome to the world twins. You just leveled up. Big time.
My email address is burkeholland at gmail dot com.
Totally sums up how I feel about being a father. It's especially interesting watching from an engineer's standpoint as my son learns how to do new things.
Also, congrats and good luck with the twins. :)
Totally did NOT see that ending coming! Your plan for world domination is that extra step closer. Congratulations!
Congratulations Jeff & family!
We have a son & twin daughters too. Think it's intense now? Wait until the girls are 14 or 15.
And thank you for a really lovely article.
Best wishes for your petit mousse :)
Nice post. But you know, the love you're impatient to give, not all of us received it. This may explain why some do not want a kid ?
Not sure, but all the best.
Congratulations Jeff! My experience is a little like yours, except that kid no. 2 turned out to be not twins but triplets. I almost feel sorry for my then-employer, for about 3 years I was more or less completely useless due to general worry and lack of sleep or relaxation. But that was five years ago and next year they will all be at school, achievement! The next big milestone is when they turn 7 or reach a certain weight, then I can get rid of the big stupid van with booster seat mounts in every position and think about driving something else.
Sean Kearney - "You didn't specify if they were monozygotic or dizygotic. Care to share? We had both."
Same here, but ours are boys. You're going to need more bathrooms I think. You can look forward to coming home from work and getting hugged by four adoring little whirlwinds, it's great.
Hello Jeff, congratulations for your new babies to come.
I wish you and your wife all the best for this wonderful gift you are receiving from life.
May God bless your entire family and may all your wishes come to life.
- Patrick Goudjo-Ako
I'll always remember a comment made to me by a sage and battle-worn parent:
"You spend the first few years trying to get them to walk and to talk. Then you spend the rest of the time trying to get them to sit down and shut up".
As a father of twins myself, you have my congratulations and best wishes.
Congrats for the girls!
Being a father of two, I absolutely agree with your very nice writting.
It's amazing how the same things you mention happened to me, living in the other side of the globe (Argentina). All of the reactions you describe, both yours and your kids, are the same things I enjoy with my kids.
It's sad how we close our minds as we grow, and how we loose that ability to enjoy the most simple things.
Jeff, mazel tov!
The lady babies will be another great adventure. I can attest, three is the magic number. I always say it's *vital* to outnumber yourself. It's what dispels the last illusion of control you may have had, and helps you experience flow in your parenting.
Good luck and have fun!
Most awesome post! Shared it with my wife (who is a non-techie and the mother of my two girls)!!
Congrats. Simply awesome:-).
A wonderful article, Jeff. Congratulation to the kids.
I can only share your feeling and happiness!
There is a content turning point here. It is from coding-related content, to parenting-related content. But anyway, be a good parent :-)
Congratulations and thank you for the beautiful post!
My wife and I had our twins, boy and girl, first and just this past August had a boy for our third. After experiencing a singleton, we now see more clearly the extra effort that was required with the twins, but just as you so eloquently described, it was worth it.
You know, we just had our third and I have to say that 3 is not substantially more difficult than 2... but we had a 2yr. stagger...
Is this article only applied for parents who have their own genetic children?? funny how all parents think their own genetic children are the cutest and the most brightest ever, specially up to the age of 12, this observation only applied to "PLANNED" child or the "FIRST" accidental child maybe.
Congratulations, and thanks for sharing!
Congratulations Jeff, parent of 2 boys here (4 and 1)....can't even begin to imagine what 2 twin girls would be like.
Might I suggest the site http://parenting.stackexchange.com/ :-)
"Having a child is a lot like running a marathon. An incredible challenge, but a worthwhile and transformative experience."
Obviously you've never run a marathon. Raising a kid makes running a marathon look like a joke. Marathons are a LOT easier, and not nearly as rewarding, worthwhile OR transformative.
But I get what you're saying. The problem is there really is no simile that I'm aware of that does justice to the experience of having & raising a kid.
-steve, a fat guy (BMI=33) who's run close to 30 marathons and ultra-marathons, up to 106 miles (having a kid is a lot harder and more rewarding than 106 miles, too.)
I don't have any kids yet. My husband really, really wants one, but I feel like the older I get, the less ready I feel. I really have just gotten my life the way I want it. I feel like I should enjoy it for a couple of years first, while I can.
I also don't like kids. I'm assuming when I have my own kid, it'll be different. My mom says that was the case for her, of course she worked for 12 hours a day while I was growing up and barely saw me.
...Anyway, I appreciate your views on parenthood. I really hate jumping into something without knowing what I'm getting into, especially a lifetime commitment like a kid. This is the best post I think I've read on the subject so far :)
God tells us that children are a blessing and each one reminds us of how blessed we are to just be alive and experience this life. I have two sets of twins myself, so I understand some of what you are going through right now. There are lots of resources available to parents of multiples. There are usually some local groups and many websites that are devoted to parenting multiples. Seek them out for guidance and tips.
Congrats! Twins! Yay... My wife's second time pregnant and I must admit, it would be my worst nightmare come true if we had twins ;-) Be strong, may your wife be strong, and hope all are good and healthy!
Btw, I like your blog.
My son was born 17 days before yours Jeff. Everything you wrote reasonated with me. Best wishes.
Magnayn: Of COURSE it's exclusionary. This is a post about parenthood and children. Why in the world are you looking for ways to directly apply it to your (consciously and deliberately) childless self? The sentence "It's difficult to explain children to people who don't yet have children" is talking about people who will have children in the future. Clearly that isn't you. It doesn't say that no other types of people exist in the world. Obviously you exist. But this post isn't for you. Move along politely and find something that is.
Jeff: Congrats! Welcome to a new part of your life that you didn't know existed, and soon you will wonder how you ever lived without.
> That one percent makes all the difference.
Actually it's 2 percent ;)
First, of course, congratulations. There's an (apparently) old Hebrew adage (paraphrased) "Children are our hostages to the future". For me, that meant, while as an educated, thoughtful individual, I cared about what the world would be like in 100 years, I didn't care the way I now do, after it struck me that my children (and grandchildren) would have to put up the the fallout from the actions of myself and others, today.
On specifically going from one to more than one child, as one of my co-workers put it "two kids are only about ten times as much work as one", and he wasn't speaking binary.
Awesome! Congrats! My DH is a reader of yours, he told me to post a comment - don't know why he couldn't since he also is a parent of twin girls..TWICE OVER! We have 2 sets of twin girls ages 6 and 2. I'm still trying to catch up on blogging that experience and will be for life at www.tandemtwinning.com
Life-changing, yes. Marriage-changing, yes. Soul-changing, yes. I've learned that marriage and parenting children are a great parable through which God imparts to us his wisdom and insight into who He is.
Congrats, I was much in the same boat. Our oldest is 14 and in high school, and we did the same thing. Decided to have another... except that we got 3 instead of 2. 3 boys born last week, scariest and greatest thing ever. Best of luck.
I agree completely with you ! Got the same feelings when my daughter was born (almost 1yr old now) life went upside down and I start to learn once again things i forgot long time ago.
Thanks for this post.
Congrats, Jeff! Having just had my third earlier this year (after a 6 year gap no less), everything you said resonated greatly with me. Loved the post, and good luck.
It gets more fun as they get older. My boy is 5 now. Yesterday we made a lego skyscrapers and talked about supersonic cars. Today I took him out on his bike and then attempted to make a sock bazooka using the vacuum cleaner.
I can't say much more than congratulations and great post, I couldn't agree more ;-))
Another great article (as ever). I'm the father of a three and a half year old boy and nodded all the way through reading it.
Congratulations to you and Mrs Attwood and your families :-)
Thanks Jeff - wonderfully refreshing words for a Wednesday lunchtime...and congratulations to you and your wife.
Congratulations! And, good luck!
My wife gave birth to identical twin girls very recently. And let me tell you that if you think it'll only be twice as tough as a single baby, you are wrong. I'm pretty sure your pie-chart is still valid for twins though - it is just a bigger personal investment for a bigger final reward. Well, that's what I keep telling myself.
Just imagine all the fun experiments now that you have potential for a control sample ;-)
Congratulations! Also, enjoyed reading this.
Love is not looking at a baby and thinking, "Oh, how cute! Oh, what possibilities!". LOVE is getting verbally bitch-slapped by your angst-ridden teenager and calmly thinking "This will pass...". :-)
Seen on a T-shirt : "D.A.D.D. - Dads Against Daughters Dating. Shoot the first one - word gets around"
Your geek army is shaping up nicely.
Many congrats Jeff!
As the father of twin girls (now 5.5), you're in for a whole NEW batch feelings to experience. They'll wrap you up around their finger faster than you can imagine. Not to mention how you even start to look at the toddler boys with just a hint of suspicion when they run around with them on the playground. 8^D
I wouldn't trade it for anything.
Thanks for such a moving post!
Your post reminded me of a quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson that encourages me to talk to people every day.
"Every man I meet is my superior in some way. In that, I learn of him." - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Firstly congrats! Great article! I couldn't have said it better!!
Our firstborns are the same age and our little son is due mid February too. So I can see where you are coming from. Good luck with your little ones!
I am waiting for my first baby (due in April 2012) and I can relate myself to your "pre baby" feelings. Can't wait to get into next level..
My wife and I are doing the same thing but in reverse order. We have two beautiful identical twin girls, 2 years old. My wife is now pregnant with a third, who happens to be a boy.
As far as raising twins, your highs and lows get amplified even further (if you can believe it). Its unquestionably more than twice the work and difficulty. But much as you cannot explain the pleasure of children to people without them, you cannot explain the pleasure of twins to parents of singletons. Seeing them grow up together to become best friends, constantly looking for each other and playing together. Its truly magical.
Feel free to ping me if you want to chat with someone whose gone through it and survived.
But I'd bet that 2 1/2 years ago you'd have know that the difference between 49 and 51 is 2 percent.
After the twins arrive +/- 10 will be close enough!!
Congratulations Jeff! We have a new release coming in mid-Feb too! Maybe one day our kids will meet :)
I felt also exactly the same!
Congratulations! And thanks for a great read.
Congratulations on those twoo soon-to-be-forked processes!
I really enjoyed this post. Thank you very much for putting it down in writing so tenderly!
Atwoods are increasing in number exponentially :-)
Happy delivery and lots of joyfull years Jeff.
Thank you for this. My firstborn is 10 months old and you described the feeling better than anyone I have come across. Thank you and good luck with your thirty little baby toes.
I'm always reminded of a Dan Simmons quote (from The Song of Kali):
>Before Victoria was born, I used to grumble about couples we knew who
had been lobotomized by the birth of their children. Perfectly intelligent people with whom we'd enjoyed countless debates over politics, prose, the death of the theater, or the decline of poetry now burbled at us about their little boy's first tooth or spent hours sharing the engrossing details of little Heather's first day at preschool. I swore that I would never fall prey
But it was different with our child. Victoria's development was worthy of serious study by anyone. I found myself totally fascinated by earliest noises and most awkward movements. Even the repellant act of changing diapers could be delightful when my child -- my child -- would wave her pudgy arms and look up at me in what I took to be loving appreciation at the thought of her father, a published poet, carrying out such mundane tasks for her.
My first and only kids are twins -- it's the best thing you'll ever do. Your sense of humor will see you through.
Congratulations! It's a blessing to create new life.
Life, that almighty entity which possess every living thing on our planet, is what i blame and thanks for all those feelings injected into me when i became a father. Its strength, as you confess, is incredible. You would shed your own just to make way for the younger, fortunately we seldom have to.
Congratulations on doubling up! I've got one and another on the way. I'll agree with you that its the most sublime, difficult, absolutely frightening, and wonderful thing I've ever done. And you're right about the bus...
Way to go!
I came here reading about programming and end up learning the best equation ever:
1+1 = 5
I don't know how you make a the coolest programming blog without even talking about it.
Best of luck with those 2 dots on the picture.
Wow, hate to admit it, but I teared up reading this - you've captured it perfectly and eloquently.
I'm in a similar boat - my 2.5 yr old girl taught me once, and the boys (16 mo's) are really drilling the point home :-)
Really well written - thanks for describing it like that, I am not a parent myself - now I understand why, in Islam, there is a saying that "don't even say ouch! to your parents" i.e. never insult or complain or hurt their feelings since they are much for vulnerable than anyone else - thanks again for the article Jeff
Congratulations! But to JWR, as a teacher I see some parents worship their children in the early years and then sort of "bail" on their kids around the age of 9 or 10. After years of being catered to, the children suddenly find themselves without a support system as the burned out parent decides they need to grow up NOW. My advice is, rather than doting on them for ten years, make sure you have age appropriate expectations of them that increase with each birthday. Consciously expect more maturity, more creativity, more independence, more responsibility, even basic time management with regards to homework and after school activities. Then when they are 10 you will not be exhausted from over-indulging them and you will have delightful children who are a pleasure to be around instead of spoiled, entitled, immature brats, and they will still be "worth it."
So Welbog was right and you *are* a vampire! Oh well.
My husband and I have 22-month-old twin boys and we feel outnumbered! Haha! These are and will be our only two children, and 51% of the time, they make me wish that we had more :) Twins are wonderful. Best of luck to you, and congratulations!
Your post brought tears to my eyes, and reminded me again of how amazing my children are. You captured the essence so well of the rollercoaster of feelings. Congratulations and thank you for reminding me how amazing my children are and how they really are the most amazing people I've ever met!
That 1% comes from the smile baby gives when he or she see his parents and that is the most precious thing in the world, it make you feel that someone in the world really needs you and your presence give him or her immense pleasure.
Dude, twins! I'm on the bandwagon too, number 4 (or will it be 4 and 5?!) due in April. Crazy, yes, and your graph is accurate. Great read.
Again ... dude ... TWINS! :)
Congratulations and blessed be.
Contrats! As a father of boy/girl twins 21 months old, here is some more reality.
1. Get a doula - no matter what the cost, how outrageous you think it it - do it. I lasted 4 weeks and got no sleep, the wife got no sleep. After the 2nd week, even the family is like, "get one now, because we are out-of-here really soon and you can't do this to her". You still won't get any sleep but, at least your wife will.
Say goodbye to 2012, you won't remember a thing. Nope, pictures will be the only way to tell how you survived. As every parent of twins has said in the last 21 months, "It gets better".
2.Get a minivan now - will ALL the features. You won't believe the difference it makes when both of you are holding a twin, pushing 2 shopping carts full of groceries, 2 diaper bags and both kiddos are screaming like banshees and you hit the open side doors and rear hatch on the remote with the hand that has the sippy cub also. You will pay anything for that feature - anything.
3. Get used to buying 2 of everything. NEVER NEVER buy 1 of anything or your twins will let you know what a horrible idea it was. You will run to the store and get another of whatever it is because sharing is much harder than having 2 of something.
And good luck learning the language of your twins. It is part of that wonderful 1%.
'Californication' nails the initial feelings of fatherhood for a first time dad.
"To my dear beautiful daughter,
I’m writing you a letter. That’s right, a good old fashioned letter. It’s a lost art, really. I have a confession to make. I didn’t like you very much at first. You were just this annoying little blob. You smelled nice, most of the time, but you didn’t seem to have much interest in me, which I of course found vaguely insulting. It was just you and your mom against the world. Funny how some things never change.
So I cruised along, doing my thing, acting the fool… Not really understanding how being a parent changes you. And I don’t remember the exact moment everything changed, I just know that it did. One minute I was impenetrable, nothing could touch me. The next, my heart was somehow beating outside my chest, exposed to the elements.
Loving you has been the most profound, intense, painful experience of my life. In fact, it’s been almost too much to bear. As your father, I made a silent vow to protect you from the world..."